New Kid on the Block
People don’t know what to make of me at the best of times. Some who don’t really know me think or think that I am full of poopie; others that do know me say that I hold a BS degree in life, (that is Bull Shite for all you that don’t know me); meaning that I can get through life fairly easily because of my stubborn determination, strong sense of humor, and the uncanny ability to do most any thing or task given to me. The word’s “I CANNOT” – have no place in my life.
Seriously though, I am for the most part a fairly easy going person. I’m not much of a people person, and I pretty much prefer to stay to myself; however, I do know how to act in the company of others and can hold my own rather well. However, the one thing about me that few people see, and truly understand is my enormous love for others. Yeah, strange that I am not much of a people person, but I love them huh! Especially children…kids…they are our future.
Kids need to be loved and nourished, taught right from wrong, listened to, helped, let fall, picked up, pushed, and more…in order to be ready to face the world. If we don’t do that, then how will they ever learn to survive and to make something of themselves??
The fact is that some people aren’t able to do all these things for one reason or another…sometimes it’s because they just aren’t capable, other times it’s because the kid is truly unwilling, or it could be any number of other reasons. So, when this happens there may be a call for help that is totally missed.
Now, I have laid the groundwork. So, let me tell you that we have a new family member…my husband, and I have become the legal guardians of a 13 year old. We have known this kid for about 6 years now, as well as various members of her family. Katie is a good kid. She is often overlooked by both sides of her birth family. Katie is treated much differently than any of her other (half or step) siblings, although none of the various family members seem to realize they are doing it. At times, when we have witnessed interaction between them, it is almost as if her family members can actually force their will into this child, just by speaking. Almost as if they were God creating the world, He spoke it happened…they speak it happens – or so they think it should! However, the other siblings are treated almost with kid gloves, soft spoken voices, gentle touches…if there is a disagreement amongst the siblings, then this is the child that is always to blame for whatever the problem is, even when it is very obvious that she was not even part of it. The same hold true with her aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents. It is almost as if she was born with a hideous deformity and is to blame for everything. The contempt that my family and I have witnessed when it comes to this child is sad.
Unfortunately, because of this, her family is missing out on what this kid has to offer. Sure, she’s 13 and can be a pain in the tail, neck, back, etc. etc. etc.. She’s 13 and has a smart mouth on her at times. Yep, she’s 13 and think that she knows everything. The fact is we were all 13 at one time, and I know that I for one was a hellion that makes this kid look like a saint. However, I do not judge her by what I did or did not do at that age. She has to spread her wings and find her space. Now our job as her guardians is to help her to soar, to teach her that there are other ways of handling conflict, to help her grow into the young woman God means her to be.
We love her family…and we pray that they will respect our wishes. We pray that God will show us the way and keep conflict from entering into our lives, and hers as we choose to carry out the duty has been passed onto us.
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